Whaaaaat? Two posts in one week? Yep, getting a start on my new year's resolution to blog more. Or maybe I just heard a topic on the radio that I wanted to write about.
So I was supposed to go into the office yesterday, but my supervisor told me if it was snowy, not to bother. Ok! I still have to go in tomorrow, but Ann Arbor traffic sucks on a good day, so I gladly avoid it when there is snow. I still had to take Emmy to my dad's though...she swears she will just play and be fine, but she gets so bored and impatient when she is home all day when I am working. I'm sure she had more fun at Baba's anyway.
So I was driving home, and one of the DJs on the radio was talking about her daughter's recent win with her dance group and how sad she was that she had to miss it. Then they all got talking about their kids' stuff they have to miss because of work and how hard it is to be a working parent and the guilt that comes along with missing some of your kid's events and milestones.
First let me say, there are downsides to working from home....I don't get as much social interaction, it can be isolating to work from home, and far too tempting to be a bum and stay in pj's all day. You also need the motivation and discipline to work when you don't have a boss nearby and I've worked many many late nights in order to be free when Em needs me.
But, I feel so very lucky that working from home allows me to spend so much time with her. I only went back to my old job for two months after maternity leave, so I was there with her so much of the time since birth. I got to see all of her firsts....the first time she rolled over, the first time she pulled herself to stand, I got to see her progression of being able to sit up by herself, and teach her so many things. I was there for her first word, her first steps, and we got to just hang out and play and cuddle when she was tiny. Even when I went back to work, that first year I only worked 10-15 hours per week so I still had a ton of time to be with her.
Even now, aside from when she is with her dad, I am available to take her to school and pick her up every day, I can re-arrange my workday if she is sick and needs to stay home or go to a doctor. I can be at parent/teacher conferences, and school recitals...
I won't lie though, making it on one income is tough and I don't make what I could for having a Master's degree. I don't even work 40 hours...I work 35 a week because working 40 would mean I have to go into the office 3 days a week instead of the 2 I do now. Yes, every bit more I make helps, but by the time you figure in my commute time, gas, and the miles on my lease, that extra 5 hours per week is more like 2. Even then 2 more hours pay/week would be better than nothing right, but the days I go into the office, I cannot get my full 7 hours in. In order to pick up Em from school, I have to leave early, and that means working more from home later on. Working 1, maybe 2 nights a week after Em goes to bed isn't horrible, but I really don't want to make it 3 nights a week. Since Em started school and I can work while she is in school, and the number of nights I have to work has decreased a lot so I really don't want to go backward and have to work more nights again.
Don't get me wrong, I make enough to cover bills but I have to seriously budget to make sure they're covered and that leaves very very little extra to do any fun stuff. Anything unexpected or out of the norm like having to buy someone a birthday gift or a cost that I forgot about like license plate tab renewals or something throws a serious wrench into my budgeting. But I make it work and I am thankful to at least have enough to cover essentials. But I do occasionally get angry that I cannot even "go nuts" from time to time and spend an extra $20 at Target on non-essentials, and I am seriously jealous of people that can just decide to jet off on a getaway for the weekend, or even take one or more real vacations a year. I am currently saving up to take Em to Disney again (for a trip she'll remember this time).....for 3 years from now. Yep, I've been saving for a year and it will take another 3, and I am not even sure if I'll have enough by then, but dammit, I will take my baby to see Minnie again!
Sometimes I think about the fact that I could be much more financially secure if I got a job with a salary that is more in line with my level of education. But, I would miss out on a lot of Emily's stuff. I wouldn't be able to take her to school and pick her up....I would miss out on that adorable face that breaks out into a smile when she sees me waiting for her outside her classroom. I'd miss out on her running to me and hugging me. I'd have to depend on my parents and ex-inlaws to get her to school and pick her up, and also likely pay for a before and after school program some days (which oddly enough, Em wants to go to). I'd have to take PTO to stay home with her on a sick day, or go to a conference, or see her perform in a concert. I wouldn't have lazy days like I had Monday when I get to be home with her all day while working from the comfort of my recliner.
Money is great, and financial security is awesome, but before I know it Emily will be all grown up and on her own. We only get one lifetime with our kids, and I love how much time I get to spend with her now. My job allows me to afford our essentials and some non-essentials and I enjoy my job too. There may be people making 6 figures and can buy whatever they want, but are miserable every second at work. The best thing my job gives me is time with my Emmy-do and that is priceless. I pinned this quote the other day, and it's so very true..."The price of anything is the amount of life you exchange for it".
