Emily apparently got a double dose of toddler today. Whew! It started with her doing something to get put in time-out, I forget what, and she peed on the couch. She doesn't do it often, but she "rage pees" as I like to call it. It's like the bodily fluids equivalent of holding your breath to get your way. Our poor couch has been peed on so many times (haha, I guess we should reconsider where her time out spot is....perhaps a chair in the kitchen. A wooden chair and ceramic tile is so much more conducive to cleaning up pee).
She was pretty good for the rest of the afternoon, and then I put her down for a nap. Once she was asleep I got started on my shredding I had to do with my work files. My filing cabinet was pretty full and I actually had time to do it today. I was watching her on the monitor to make sure it didn't wake her up, but it never had in the past. But then....she woke up! Crap! She had only been asleep for half an hour or less. Sometimes if she wakes early like that she'll go right back to sleep, but nope. After 5 or 10 minutes I could tell she wasn't going back to sleep, and I still had more shredding to do so I went in and got her.
She was good the rest of the afternoon, we dyed Easter eggs and she was very good about not touching the water or the glasses it was in since it was very hot water. Then around 6, which I call Emily cranky o'clock, the terrible three's set in. I was trying to get my office straightened up and she decided to bring all of the throw pillows in from the couch. My office is small enough, I didn't need all this crap in there when I was trying to clean. Then she tried grabbing the binder clip that keeps my phone charger from falling through the hole-thing in my desk. I told her no three times and she was still trying to grab it, so I sent her to time out. I heard her go in the living room and tell daddy, "mommy said no time out". My husband was like um, ok.
Finally I yelled out to him that I sent her out there to go time out. So he said to her, she did tell you to get in time out, so go. So that kicked off a good 15 minutes of crying in time out. Then she kept singing and talking way too loudly while we were trying to watch TV. Oh, and earlier when I was cleaning my office, she came in to say, momma I peed. It wasn't rage pee, but she peed on her bedroom floor. I had just taken her to the potty not long before that, so I was annoyed that she had to go again and didn't tell us. Most of the time she is so good, but then every once in a while I guess she gets too into what she is doing to stop and pee.
So after dinner I told her she had to pick up her toys tonight. I know part of it is our fault because we are not consistent and don't make her clean up every night. I just lose track of time, and before I know it we've barely finished dinner and it's already time for bed. If I am going to get her tucked in and stories read and everything and get done in time to start working by 9 or 9:30, most nights we don't think to have her pick up her toys until it is bedtime right now, and we don't have time for the Sloth on Ambien to take an hour to pick up 10 things. So, it doesn't get done, the living room always looks like a landfill, and she doesn't want to pick up her toys the few times we ask her to.
I tried to offer incentive....I gave her 15 minutes to get it cleaned up, and whatever time was left, she could play on my phone. So if she got it done quickly, she'd have at least 10 minutes to play. If she took too long, she got no time. This has worked in the past, but tonight she wasn't having it. She refused to even try picking them up, and kept telling me to do it. I kept telling her she wouldn't get any time to play on my phone, and if she didn't do what I said, she wouldn't get bedtime stories either. I felt bad about taking that away, last night we got home late from Grammy's and she hadn't had a nap, and I needed to work so I told her we were going to skip stories, and the next night not only would she get extra stories, but I would lay down with her for a while. She always wants me to lay with her and sing to her, but most nights I can't because I have to work, so I said I would tonight since I don't work on Friday nights.
But, I just couldn't give her EXTRA stories and lay down with her like she likes, after she deliberately refused to do what she was told. It would just feel like way too much of a reward for misbehaving. So of course as soon as I told her to get to bed, she started crying and begged to play on my phone. Then she asked, pick up toys? I said no, you missed your chance. I don't want her to think she can refuse to do what I say, and then still get the opportunity to behave and do what she is supposed to when I already told her she missed her chance and took away something good. If I do that, she'll never do things the first time I ask her. She did cry some when I tucked her in because of it all, but she actually took it pretty well. Most of the time, even on a good night I'll say goodnight and she'll smile and say goodnight and I say I love you and she says I wuv you and I say sweet dreams and she tells me to have sweet dreams. The second the door clicks closed, she starts wailing and crying.
This has been going on for about 2 or 3 months now. I can tell when it's a serious cry and she needs something, and when she just doesn't want to go to bed. Like when I put her down for nap, she insisted on taking her pillow case off her pillow and putting it on her legs like she was a mermaid. I tucked her in, closed the door, and whaaaa. But after a few minutes I could tell it was something more, so I went back in. She decided she did not want to wear her pillow case, and wanted it back on her pillow. But tonight, aside from a few tears when I told her no stories tonight, she did really well. No crying or yelling once I closed the door. I thought maybe it was because she was so tired and that she'd fall asleep quickly, but she was still awake for about an hour before she fell asleep. Maybe she realized she deserved no stories and decided to take it easy on me tonight. Haha, yeah right.
Tomorrow when she gets up from her nap we're going to take her to Baba's house for a sleepover. We want to put a bathroom in the basement, and our first step is to get plumbers over to give us a quote for digging the shower, sink, and toilet lines, but the area that will be the bathroom is full of stuff. Lately she loves coming downstairs with me to do laundry and scoop the litterbox, so I am sure she would want to be down there while we cleaned. It's not an area I want her spending too much time in, there is stuff everywhere and I don't want her to come across something she shouldn't like a tool, or run into some furniture that's sticking out in her way. Plus it will just be easier to clean without her underfoot. So then we get a nice quiet evening and Baba and Grammy get the whole afternoon and night with her. Then we'll go over there Sunday for Easter dinner. I was a little bummed when I realized she won't be home to wake up and get her easter basket Sunday morning, but it's not as big of a deal as Christmas. She can look for it when she gets home. I think the easter bunny is going to hide it this year and make her play hot and cold to look for it.
So, after a few weeks of thinking about it, I've decided no on another baby. I got all excited for a little bit at the idea of it, but in reality, there are still a million circumstances that would make another pregnancy and baby very difficult. I know my friend loves her two boys to the moon and back, but she was very blunt with me, and said two is definitely a lot of work. I am glad she was so honest, because most people say, yeah two is harder, but it's so fun to see them together and you get used to it and you'll be fine, just do it. There are some days I feel like I am barely keeping my head above water with just one, plus the dog (whose like a damn baby herself) the house, work, and trying to be active and sometimes do things just for fun. I am sure people with 3 or more kids would laugh at me, but maybe some people are just better suited with one child. In a perfect world, another child would be nice. But I don't NEED another child. I needed A child. I couldn't imagine my life without getting a tke home baby. And I got that with Emily. She is more than enough for me. Is a part of me sad that I was dealt the hand I was and ended up with only one living child? Yeah. But there are definitely worse things than only having one sweet, precious, adorable child who gives hugs and will just randomly come up to me and say I wuv you mommy. I'll be ok.
No comments:
Post a Comment