Good news, good news, eh news and bad news

I saw my doctor today and she had all of my test results for me.  I'll try to remember most of them...MH's SA was good, she said the count was good and the motility was also good.  She found it interesting though, that while both counts were in the completely normal range, the first one was such a higher count than the second.  We were quite certain his results would be fine since he did get me pregnant once, and his sperm isn't what is keeping me from ovulating.  But it is nice to have the confirmation that everything is fine.

The other good results were, I am not menopausal or peri-menopausal, she said I have plenty of eggs left, so that is good of course.  My kidneys and liver are fine which I already knew from the last bloodwork and whatever it is they tested to see if I can produce milk for nursing was also fine...oh and I have been vaccinated against rhubella and chicken pox, so I don't have to worry about getting vaccinated or catching either disease when pregnant which could cause birth defects.

The eh news is a few things.  First, my thyroid levels are off just a bit, so she wants me to try upping my meds for that before we try clomid.  I was hoping that if I didn't O this cycle, clomid would be the next step but she wants me to try this first.  I have mixed emotions about this....on the one hand I think it's awesome that she is being conservative and smart about it.  With so many doctors handing out clomid like it's candy, being conservative is not a bad thing.  And, if upping my metformin and now my thyroid meds is all it takes to ovulate, why wouldn't I want to go that route?  However, I am impatient.  I wanted to be pregnant a year ago, so waiting yet another month or two before trying clomid is frustrating.  BUT, it's better to be safe than act on my impatients (is that a word?).  Besides, if I start clomid in January, I will already be 4 months ahead because I originally wasn't even going to start seeing the RE until January.  And January would give me a September due date...sounds silly, but I would love a fall due date.  Just looking for the silver lining. 

Onto some bad news...I am not diabetic, but I am pre-diabetic.  Eeesh, that was scary to hear.  Of course I know I need to lose weight, but that news really drove it home.  So, I've got to buckle down and get serious.  And I have been, since I started WW I have been doing pretty well, unfortunately I barely have anything to show for it.  I think I've lost about 3 pounds so far, but that's because I keep Yo Yoing.  This week is going to be bad as well...with Halloween candy in the house, it's hard to be good.  Plus we're having a pot luck at work tomorrow, so yeah.  I'll try not to go insane, but to think I will be totally good and stay within my points at a potluck is pretty unrealistic.  But I will get back on track on Saturday.  However, I was thinking today...I get really down on myself when I don't do well, and how I yo yo so often.  I've been at WW for about 8 weeks now, so had I had a loss every week I could have lost 8-10 pounds by now, maybe more.  But I am stuck at 3....but, had I not been working out when I did or sticking to my points when I did, I might have not lost that 3, and could have even gained more.  So there....I'm just full of silver linings today.

Ok, so back to the eh news.  My temp dropped this morning and FF took away my CHs.  I was pretty bummed because I was so hoping I really did O.  So I took my chart with me to the doctor, and the first thing she said was, well it looks like you might have ovulated this month.  I told her about FF taking the CHs away, and she said well I don't know about the program, but it looks good to me.

I like FF, and I think it's a great program, but surely there is some margin of error.  It said so itself, when it took my CHs away, it didn't say I didn't O, it said it can no longer support the assumption of O.  She said my chart looks much better than she expected, and she is an RE so I want to trust her opinion.  But she basically said, give it until Friday, if I get my period then I must have (or at least very likely) Od...if not I can call the office for provera to start over.  No matter what though, she wants me to up my thyroids meds starting tomorrow, so hopefully even if I didn't O, getting all my meds on track might help.

So I don't know what to think.  I am praying I Od....I am feeling slightly crampy, but right now it's not enough to say yes, my period is going to start any minute.  So it's hard to say if I am really feeling crampy or if it is more in my head.  So I really really hope my period starts in the next 2 days.  She also wants me to come back in a few weeks to have my bloodwork done to see if my thyroid is at the right level.  I guess I am a little dissapointed because I was hoping I either Od for sure, or we would be starting me on clomid this coming cycle.  Things are a little more up in the air than I had hoped, but I like my doctor, I agree with her line of thinking, I'm just being impatient.  Hopefully it all works out for the best.